Hello everyone. So today, 2 days before my brother's birthday, I was having lunch with him and our mom. Everything was fine, and I was telling my brother and mom a joke\* I saw on a humorist's video very badly and he kept stopping me and asking me where's the joke and I went like 'nevermind" because I sensed it wasn't making much sense with me telling it. He then tried to explain to me what a joke is and I got pretty worked up and asked him to leave it alone when I started feeling overwhelmed. He tried 3 more times and I asked him to just leave it because I was feeling more and more overwhelmed and just wanted to calm down before I spilled over (I tend to have panic attacks when in arguments). I proceeded to manage to calm myself down and not cry. I then talked to my mom about her work, my studies and stuff. I then said I was taking the bus to the supermarket to get his birthday cake ingredients, thinking it was water under the bridge at this point. He then interrupted me and started telling me not to bother with the cake. I then told him I'd still be going because I wanted to bake a cake, even if it wasn't for him, at least we'd still have the ingredients for another time. He proceeded to tell me not to bother with a gift anyways. I snapped back : "well I don't really even want to gift you something anymore..." And then my mom told us to chill the check out and told my brother he drained my smile. My dad then got home, they proceeded to explain and talk over each other and I got up bc I didn't want to eat with someone who is making me more mad than I was and I finished eating in the kitchen. My mom told me it is okay if I don't want to bake anything and gift him anything as she won't either unless he talked it out with me because she was appaled at how he handled it all. I don't really want to bake his cake if he won't apologize to me for how he acted. Note that it isn't the first time we've fought over stuff like this, but it is the first time I felt as disrespected as I did. I was even researching the recipe that morning, was writing down the ingredients and was going to buy the ingredients in the afternoon. I was even the one who organized the gift for him, it was a guitar and I went around suggesting we could all put money towards it, and my dad, my mom, my other brother all agreed to do it. I'm so tired of always being the one to buy good gifts, last year he got a sword, a few years back, he got a painting. I am not a materialistic person by any means (yeah no, ngl, it's nice to own stuff, but I won't bite my tongue if I don't have what I want, if you know what I mean, but I love gifting people stuff and baking them stuff on special occasions. \*: The joke was from Finlay Christie, and the video was the one where he talked about his black girlfriend's test to see if he was racist or not. I thought it was funny and I shared it with them, but I fumbled really bad with the presentation so the end of the joke wasn't as funny.