I (33f) asked my cousin (37f) to be my MOH in October 2024. We've always had a somewhat close relationship but there have been a lot of times she put me in uncomfortable situations in order to get what she wanted. I've never had the guts to stand up to her because she can be pretty mean and nasty when she's confronted. Me and my fiance secure our venue and the planning starts. She didn't really offer any help with any of the wedding planning but she did hyper focus on the bachelorette and bridal shower so I thought, those events would be amazing since she was "putting so much thought" into them. Boy was I wrong. I ended up planning my entire bachelorette. 5 weeks before our trip, 10 girls going to palm springs and nothing was booked except the air bnb. If I didn't tell her to book it, it didn't get done and I ended up booking most things. As for the shower, my future MIL took that over completely because MOH wasn't. The moment she got to the airbnb, she turned her brain off. She bought stuff for bachelorette bags but made someone else build them and made everyone else decorate. In the party bus on Sat. night after dinner, she said "I'm just so thankful that (bridesmaid) is taking charge because I'm always the mom of the group and I just want to party". I think she thinks that way because she's an ER nurse so she is always taking care of people in the hospital but SHE was supposed to be hosting ME and MY FRIENDS. She didn't help clean on Sunday but commented "the house looks great ladies". The whole trip there was little effort on her part in everything. I ended up spending $650 at my own bachelorette. Throughout all of the planning for this trip, she needed constant validation. If I didn't like an idea, it was a personal jab to her entire personality. I got attitude and pushback and I started feeling bad when I would say I wanted something different, like her wants mattered more than mine and I was fighting for my own spotlight. Then she would say her grandma was stressing her out, her new meds were affecting her mood, lack of sleep or some other excuse, then an apology. This emotional roller coaster was draining me. The biggest reason though, was one of her low moments, she told a bridesmaid I was "already married" and said she was stepping down as MOH all because I didn’t respond to her text right away. That comment told me my wedding meant nothing to her. She claimed she was "at her wits end" with me when all I did was take a break from the wedding stuff to breathe. So AITA for removing my cousin as MOH but still allowing her to be a bridesmaid?