For context, I (18M) have known my best friend, who we’ll call John (18M) since elementary school. John and I have both been through some sticky situations in our love life, and we’ve bonded over that. However, John has never had an official relationship before. Recently, he finally got his first girlfriend, and I was overjoyed for him. But my feelings over it quickly changed. His girlfriend (18F) early in the relationship began saying things like “I miss my ex” and “this reminds me of my ex”, which I thought to be a red flag. It’s ok to be friends with your ex in some situations, but I just feel like she isn’t over him. Despite this fact, John seems so blinded by her being his first real girlfriend, that he’s ignored these comments from her, or simply doesn’t care. But that isn’t all. His girlfriend has also told him that she hates all of his friends, including me. She said this before even meeting me, or the majority of his friends. The reasoning behind this, is one of John and I’s mutual friend said the n-word while she was around, he is of course white. I agree that there isn’t really ever a reason to say that, and that it was inappropriate of him. But I don’t understand why I’m being dragged into something that doesn’t involve me. And since she declared this hatred for us, he’s been hanging out with our entire group of friends less, and with her more. As well as these things, John has told me how he frequently gets her gifts, and that she expects them. He told me that he forgot to get her a gift one time, and she immediately started crying and saying that he doesn’t love her anymore. This wasn’t for a birthday or any type of event, just a hangout the two of them had, I felt like that was an overreaction. So I went to talk to him about all of the things that I just mentioned. I told him I feel like he’s being turned against us, and I just think he’s being treated poorly. After saying that, he immediately started telling me that I am “just jealous” and that I need to “get a life”. I am of course an outsider to this relationship, but I can’t help but feel like this isn’t healthy for him, I’m just concerned. And because of these reasons, I think he should leave her. Am I out of line? Am I the asshole? Clarification: Hi all, just because I had a couple of people ask about the mutual friend that said the n-word, let me clarify. For starters, I said he was a mutual friend, but I think it’s more accurate to say we are “friendly” not “friends”. It’s the kind of situation where you’re “school friends” but not “real friends”. He didn’t ever say it before when I was with him at school. I haven’t talked to him in a while, we grew distant after graduation. I was also not present when he said it around John and his gf, which is what mainly fuels my confusion as to why I was bunched into that. Thank you all for the support and advice! I will get back with an update if one comes!