OK, so here's the story. About 8 weeks ago I found out that my son and his girlfriend are pregnant. This will be my first gandbaby. My sister, also found out that her daughter is pregnant. And we were both excited. My son and daughter in law have been in contact with me every step of the way, even though they live in another state. My sister's daughter, however, told my sister that she didn't want her to be part of the baby's life yet. My niece explained that my sister has a history of drug abuse and alcoholism and until she felt more comfortable that my sister is clean and sober, she wants to be cautious. So the other day, my son and DIL shared a picture of their first ultrasound with me. Which, of course I wanted to share with my sisters. So, me, my sister who's daughter is pregnant (S1) , and our oldest sister (S2) are on a video chat when I mentioned the ultrasound pics. S2 asked if I could share them, and S1 hung her head and said it makes her sad about her daughter. I replied, "S1, I'm so sorry for your situation, but please don't steal my joy." That is when stuff hit the fan. S2 told me I was being selfish and I should have told S1 that we could share my gandbaby until her daughter comes around. I told her I don't want to do that. I didn't choose drugs over my children, I didn't abandon my children, S1 did. And now that our kids are grown up and starting to have families of their own, we are reaping the consequences of how we treated them. Am I the ass hole? Should I have "shared" my gandbaby with S1? I feel like I have to stifle my joy, or not share anything because S1 made bad choices. Why are her feelings more important than mine? And why should I have to suffer her consequences? I'm happy, my kids are happy, it's my sister's happiness my responsibility?