For context, I (25M) am Autistic, and I struggle with social cues, but I try my best to be aware. We had a get together with some family. My Uncle’s BF(55M) was there, who we’ll call Brett. We often get along, and I enjoy chatting because there’s good banter, ribbing, and debate. Today we were talking about books. At one point he said something like “I like books, but I don’t like to read”, to which I jokingly replied “But, that’s how books work”, as banter. Later he questioned my Wife and I rereading books, which he thought was weird. While asking why he doesn’t re-read books, he basically said it’s because it takes him forever. I jokingly said “Sounds like a skill issue” He went off on me publicly and said that was “A C*nty thing to say” and that “I called him stupid to his face”. I didn’t think he was serious, but after realizing he was offended I tried to explain and apologize. I told him I didn’t mean to be hurtful, and that Skill Issue is internet speak, but Brett said that my intention didn’t matter, and soon left the room. Later I asked Brett if we could talk. I said I was sorry what I said hurt him, and I never meant to do that. I also said his response went too far, even though I got where it came from. He doubled down, saying he’d do it again. He again said my intention was irrelevant. I called out that on past occasions he has called my Wife’s eating habits “Disgusting”, made remarks about how weird we are, and more. He said those were just jokes, and didn’t acknowledge the hypocrisy when I pointed it out, and said I shouldn’t use logic here. All this time I am still apologetic, and said I would like to just leave this behind us if we can. He took this time to point out that apparently this wasn’t the first time I’d said something that offended him, and claimed that I “treat him like the help” simply because I don’t always say hi to him, even though I’ll have full conversations with him. I said that he should have told me, because how could I know, especially given my Autism, which he knows I have. He acted like I was making excuses, and I clarified that it’s not an excuse, simply a likely contributing factor that I can’t help. I also told him if it happens again to come tell me directly and we can deal with it, and if he wants me to cut the banter and ribbing when we talk then I will. He claimed now I want him to censor me so he’s the bad guy. I realized I wasn’t getting anywhere, so I ended by apologizing again, acknowledging that I’ll probably mess up in the future, but I’ll work on it, and I’d like to move past this and be cordial. He begrudgingly accepted. On the drive home I talked with my Wife, and she agreed that while my initial comment was a bit out of line (which I can see now), the situation escalated because of his remarks. I recapped how the talk went, and she agreed that he was being stubborn and hypocritical. So, AITA?